ADHD

Helping ADHD using Psychotherapy at 1066 Therapy 

covering East Sussex, Battle, Hastings, Bexhill, Rye, Heathfield, Hailsham, Eastbourne, Crowborough, Brighton, Tunbridge Wells, Tonbridge, Ashford, Maidstone and Kent.

Psychotherapy for ADHD, anxiety, hyperactivity, dissociation, lack of focus, in Battle, Hastings, Rye, Bexhill, Heathfield, East Sussex, Kent, UKHaving a diagnosis of ADHD – Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder – can be distressing. Or it may be comforting, in a way. Some people process it as meaning there’s ‘something wrong with them’ that they may feel helpless to change. [This isn’t true – see below for more]. Others may feel a sort of relief that there is a ‘label’ or frame for understanding their symptoms / problems. Others may welcome palliative treatment in the form of medication to manage their symptoms. And a few may use the diagnosis as an ‘excuse’ for inappropriate or unacceptable behaviours. This is instead of getting help and/or working on the behaviours. It depends on the individual. Of course, I am using simple explanations here. We are more complex than any diagnosis or set of symptoms.

I have studied the lasting impacts on people of experiencing adverse childhood environments / events for the majority of my therapy career. I have had a special interest in the impacts on the developing brain and nervous system. Many of these impacts have significant overlap with the symptoms of ADHD (and ADD and ODD). It is rare, although possible, that a single significant event causes such impacts. These events could be, for instance, a traumatising birth, a badly-managed operation, a serious car accident etc. It is much more common for there to be smaller, repeated events that have cumulative traumatising effects over time. There are many ways this may happen but the most common are:

Please follow the links above for more information.

I will add here that, unfortunately, our society often views what amounts to bullying as ‘normal parenting practices’ and / or ‘kids being kids’. This is especially the case with the verbal forms. There is plenty of information available as to the different forms of verbal bullying. The most common are shouting / yelling, name-calling (stupid, useless etc), blaming, and judging / criticising. Those who are bullying others usually don’t understand the impacts of their behaviours. Therefore, they are unlikely to stop. Indeed many were parented in similar ways. So, they are just copying the model handed down to them. We need to do better going forward.

In addition, the impacts of such experiences are deeper for those of us with a genetic predisposition for higher-than-average sensitivity. Sadly, many such children are called ‘too sensitive’ and / or dismissed for ‘over-reacting’. They’re told to ‘grow up’, ‘grow a spine’ etc instead of receiving the emotional support they need in such situations. When we give appropriate support, it is not ‘mollycoddling’ them. It is helping them to build emotional resilience by knowing that somebody cares for them and will support them when they need it.

Dr Gabor Mate is considered an expert in this field and has his own Adult ADHD diagnosis. He has written and presented on it quite extensively. His work, which describes ADHD as more of a developmental issue rather than a solely genetic one, has encouraged me. He says that there tends to be a genetic predisposition towards higher-than-average sensitivity in individuals with a diagnosis or symptoms. Genetic predispositions are not the same as the genes which determine eye and hair colour etc. Unlike those, the science of epigenetics informs us that our experiences have the capacity to activate and deactivate our genetic predispositions.

So our experiences, as always, play a part in the development of any disease / disorder. Our environment and earliest experiences affect our predispositions, for good or ill. Our environment includes the people in it. This is mainly our parents and family of origin in our first few years. Indeed, experts deem the first 1500 days of life the most crucial for our neurological / emotional development.

Of course, a lot of that time is pre-verbal. So, we have no words for our experiences. Even if we did, we would not know whether our experiences were what we needed for healthy neurological development, or not. Our brain and nervous system just develop in response to our environment, however it may be. Put simply, if we don’t instinctively (there’s no logic or thinking involved as we are too young to do that) feel safe and secure, our system will develop to cope with a high level of threat and insecurity. And, assuming nothing much changes day-to-day, it will stay like that. Effectively ‘stuck’ in survival mode.

A system which is ‘stuck’ in survival mode (essentially ready for the next threat) will be highly dysregulated and we may be assessed as ‘hyperactive’. The ‘H’ part of ADHD. Of course, if we are on high alert for potential threat, we won’t be able to pay attention very well. The ‘AD’ part of ADHD. The books The Invisible Lion by Benjamin Fry and Scattered Minds by Gabor Mate explain these phenomena very well. I will add that we don’t consciously ‘know’ that we feel unsafe / insecure as children. It is the instinctive, primitive, survival-based mechanisms in the brain involved here.

The good news is that ‘genetic’ in this context does not mean it’s unchangeable, like eye colour for example. I have worked with people who either have symptoms that match those listed for ADHD or who have a diagnosis of such. It doesn’t matter that they are safe enough in their life now. The sense of feeling unsafe is lodged in their nervous system. However, it IS possible to gradually establish a felt sense of safety and security using appropriate therapy. We can work through and process what the system is holding that is ‘upsetting’ it and creating symptoms. This usually significantly eases ADHD / ADHD-like symptoms, assuming we do enough work. I tend to use Lifespan Integration for this work: click the link for more information.

I hope this gives people their own hope for what can be done to help. Over-identifying with any diagnosis can create its own issues. Click the link here for information on this: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/love-them-or-leave-them/202604/when-a-diagnosis-becomes-your-entire-identity

I will end with this quote: “There is nothing sacred about diagnoses. They are simply the names of territories we are trying to understand.” Elinor Greenberg PhD author of the book: Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid Adaptations.

Call or text me now on 07722783490 to book your free 30 minute initial consultation.

1066 Therapy helping the people of East Sussex, Battle, Hastings, Bexhill, Rye, Heathfield, Hailsham, Eastbourne, Brighton, Crowborough, Tunbridge Wells, Tonbridge, Ashford, Kent.