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Overcoming
problems with Anger using
Releasing
anger appropriately, at the right person, about the right thing and
at the right time can be liberating and
cathartic but this is very hard to get just right! And what about
all the other times you lose your temper...? Apart from not being
very attractive..... There is still some debate about whether anger is a primary emotion, like love and fear for example, or whether it is a secondary emotion 'masking' another, usually more uncomfortable, feeling such as hurt, insecurity, vulnerability etc. I see it as a bit of both. Anger is often a reaction to pain, either physical pain (witness the immediate reaction if you hit your thumb with a hammer, say!) or emotional pain or a bit of both. Another universal trigger for anger is the sense of being threatened or endangered either physically or, more often, symbolically as in a perceived threat to your self-esteem or dignity. An angry reaction to physical pain is really easy to notice and understand but it's not nearly as easy to be aware of an angry reaction to emotional pain; nevertheless anger is very often a 'mask' for other emotions such as sadness, insecurity, helplessness, fear, vulnerability and basically anything that feels painful to you. Similarly, sensing an actual physical threat to yourself and getting angry is completely normal and is actually what is needed to help you 'fight or flee' in such a situation but when anger arises from the perceived symbolic threats to your self-esteem and dignity - your ego - it's not so easy to deal with or understand. In fact, these angry reactions to 'symbolic threats' overlap with 'anger-as-a-mask' for more uncomfortable feelings - it's all about emotions rather than actual physical pain or threats. So, anger is a normal, natural reaction to physical pain or physical endangerment and it can be a reaction to uncomfortable thoughts and perceptions of being symbolically threatened and most everyone will get angry on occasion. But what if you have a real problem with anger? You fly off the handle over anything and everything? What is that all about? And what can you do about it? If you have anger problems the chances are very high that you are not regularly experiencing actual physical threats or physical pain which would explain your problem. Most often, the people I see for anger issues have underlying problems of low self-esteem, a fear of being judged and worrying about what others think about them, low confidence, insecurity and so on and their anger is a reaction to the more uncomfortable feelings they have about themselves and the perceived symbolic threats to their 'ego'. All of these underlying problems are caused by having bottled-up, unresolved emotions. Less common are those with anger problems who are suffering from stress overload which basically makes them feel like it's almost impossible to cope with just about any of life's everyday stresses, strains and challenges without over-reacting and getting angry. Stress overload is also largely caused by people having bottled-up, unresolved emotions. Learning ways to cope with your anger, such as anger management or CBT, have become popular in recent years and they can help you to 'manage' your short fuse and angry outbursts to varying degrees BUT this will be only controlling your symptoms and you will still have the causes, the underlying problems of low self-esteem etc and/or stress overload - those bottled up emotions - to deal with. Ultimately then, in order to resolve your anger issues properly you will have to deal with and resolve your underlying problems or stress overload - those bottled up feelings actually causing your problems.
'Pure' Hypnoanalysis uncovers the original root causes, your bottled up emotions, and frees you from the need to get angry to cover up your true feelings so you can enjoy a happier, more relaxed life. Some people may be better suited to going through the Changing Limiting Beliefs programme and this will be decided upon during the initial meeting. CHANGE YOUR LIFE Call me now on 07722 783490 or 01424 772392 to book your free initial consultation.
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